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WAISers, Apologize!--To the Turkeys

     I once suggested that the bald eagle, an ugly bird and a scavenger which lives off dead fish, should be replaced as the national symbol by the turkey, as Benjamin Franklin proposed. WAISers responded that this idea was for the birds, and that Ben was joking.
     I was talking turkey. The historical record supports me. Ben was referring to our native turkey, not to the kind WAISers ate yesterday, a pre-NAFTA Mexican import. The wild turkey was abundant and rejoiced the colonists. Ben admired the bird's intelligence and speed, its beautiful bronze-and-white feathers. He observed that during the mating ritual, the turkey's head turned red, white and blue. The moral is: Make love patriotically, not war on a dead fish.

Ronald Hilton - 11/26/99